Design Eat Repeat

0 In a medium-sized bowl or measuring cup, stir together warm water [adjustable](1 cup), active dry yeast (2 ¼ teaspoons), light brown sugar (2 tablespoons), and melted salted butter (2 tablespoons)[/adjustable]. You can get the warm water directly from the faucet - no need to heat it up more. Let sit for 10 minutes or until there's a layer of foam/bubbles on the top.*See notes below if your mixture doesn't foam or bubble.
2 While the yeast is proofing, mix together all-purpose flour [adjustable](3 cups) and salt (1 teaspoon)[/adjustable] in a large bowl. Use your hand to create a crater in the middle of the bowl. This is where you'll pour the water mixture.After the 10 minutes have passed, stir the yeast mixture and pour into the crater you created in the flour bowl.
4 Use a spatula to mix the dough until it's combined. Once all the flour is incorporated, use your hands to knead the dough into a smooth ball. This should only take 1-2 minutes tops (any longer and you'll overwork the dough).
6 Grease the bowl with oil and place the dough ball back into the bowl, coating the dough in the oil. Cover the bowl with plastic wrap (or a clean dish towel) and let sit for 30 minutes. This will allow the dough to rest & rise a tiny bit (it won't rise much, which is fine).
10 Preheat oven to 350℉ and line a baking sheet with parchment paper.
8 Divide the dough into 4 equal pieces and use your hands to roll each section into a long strip. Use a knife, kitchen scissors, or pizza cutter to cut into pieces, then roll into balls. 
19 In a medium bowl, mix together warm water [adjustable](1 cup) and baking soda (1 tablespoon)[/adjustable]. Be sure to use a tablespoon and not a teaspoon!
12 Dip each bite in the baking soda mixture and place on parchment-lined baking sheet. Sprinkle with coarse sea salt or pretzel salt, if desired.
16 Bake for 10-12 minutes until lightly golden brown.
20 Use a pastry brush or spoon to brush warm pretzels with melted salted butter. This is what truly gives it that mall pretzel taste - don't skip the salted butter! 
18 Enjoy warm with cheese sauce!